Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Disclaimer

Had yet another conversation with a so-called friend who’s known me since long before the blogging days and who completely failed to grasp that a particular post was tongue in cheek. It was the kind of post where if you don’t understand the tone (however subtle), well, you know very little about me – so the miscommunication was quite worrying, because now I’m wondering if maybe this friend was friends all those years with someone she didn’t know. I should stop being be so intolerant of the anonymous commenters/trolls who take everything at face value: if one’s own can be so easily deceived, why expect others to understand? (Note to Karan Johar: it’s all about bluffing your family.)

So here, to make things simpler for everyone: nothing on this blog is to be taken seriously. Ever. (Except this post, of course.) I don’t actually read books or watch films, I just make up things about them for fun. (On the few occasions that I do read or watch something, I invariably dislike it but still force myself to write good things about it just to perpetuate the all-inclusive image.) I’ve never actually driven in Delhi. I love Sanjeev Kumar, PR people, radio jockeys, Rahul Dravid and Julia Roberts, though not in that order. I admire and envy the clever wordplay of Delhi Times and HT City writers and hope to intern for those esteemed magazine supplements someday. I’m deeply religious at heart and I secretly endorse all customs and traditions, even the dangerous ones like rakhi. Every once in a while I write manipulative sensitive posts just so I can sit back and muhaha at all the cloying comments they attract. Everything I’ve written before this has been an outright lie or at least a joke. On the few occasions that I’ve tried to write a sincere, honest post about any topic, it’s backfired because I’ve completely revised my opinion just a few hours after publishing the thing.

Believe nothing you read, all ye who deface this site.

15 comments:

  1. If I hadn't met you, I'd also presume you didn't exist.

    You do realise, I hope, that some chappies are now going to think of you as a Sanjeev Kumar and Rahul Dravid fan. You're way too subtle, even when yoy italicise 'nothing'!

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  2. Awww baybee, comeon, doan pout like that, here have this toffee..now!

    But seriously, are you concered about the lack of the sense of irony in the bloggers community (or the part u get to see) or with the fine moral distinction between being just facetious and being (apparently)honest and getting hell lot of attention, much to the ire of the neglected bloggers?

    But then again, you ARE out there to get some attention aren't you? And this may initiate some in depth discussion on the morality, psyche, philosphy, metaphysics, and bullcrap of blogging!

    D

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  3. did you really write this post? YOU? WTF!

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  4. i am shocked, and at a loss of words.

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  5. Wait! You mean...you mean...all those years, all those posts you were LYING!! *eyes filling with tears! How could you do this to me Jai? How? How? Ah, cruel world!

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  6. I am a Sanjeev Kumar fan. And oh ok, also a Rahul Dravid fan.

    And you do realise that you've started a classic "I always lie" conundrum?

    J.A.P.

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  7. i'm tempted to ask, like kaspar hauser, if you are a frog.

    and waiting breathlessly for the answer.

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  8. what, you don't like rahul dravid?

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  9. Which post which post?

    And, ahem, excuse me, but when you say 'nothing on this blog is to be taken seriously' I sure hope it doesn't include my comments, because they are always to be taken seriously. Even earnestly and solemnly. I am that kind of person.

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  10. it's all been a lie?! I supposseee time will heal this scathing laceration on my blogger soul as well...

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  11. If I hadn't met you, I'd also presume you didn't exist.

    Amit: And now you’re convinced I do?

    Alok: what are you trying to insinuate? I love Rahul Dravid.

    Marauder: yes, you shall be accorded all the seriousness due to a person who uses phrases like "I sure hope..."

    Shivam: for a young boy of your talents, you are much too easily surprised.

    JAP: at least I'm honest about my alter egos ;-)

    Sony Pony: "scathing laceration"? Ow, that must hurt. I’d think a laceration would be bad enough…

    Falstaff: get a grip on yourself man, it's been less than two years.

    Space Bar: I am a frog.

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  12. First time, I am writing a comment here

    because

    now i doubt.....that you even exist!!!!

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  13. Since you were talking about pre-blogging friends, thought I'd pitch in...and remark on how you haven't changed at all since those beautiful days!

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  14. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

    Jabberwock,
    Life without you would be so boring,
    so boring. I end up laughing maniacally when I visit your site. Which bastard thought your blog was to be taken seriously?
    KEEP EXISTING. Please.
    Right now I cannot even laugh because my rommmate is snoring.

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